How I Keep My true Priorities in Check
Personal journal: June 2024
Back in 2016, I wrote the most terrifying email of my life, addressing not just one person but at least 50: “With excitement, I write to announce that I am launching a coaching business.” Gulp.
To say I was uncomfortable is an understatement. I made a career pivot that seemed ludicrous even to me. Less than two years later, I stepped out of full-time work into the abyss of entrepreneurship, having no idea that by 2024, I would have coached hundreds of people, including some of the most impressive individuals I know.
I took a path less traveled. Why? Because becoming a coach had become a true priority. Today, I provide coaching, consulting, and organizational development support to high-achieving, mission-driven people and organizations. I have a healthy income, the flexibility to be there for my family, and a career that allows me to activate and lean into my strengths in ways I never had before.
The most surprising thing about all of this is that I had to take many hundreds—probably thousands—of small actions that collectively added up to this bigger shift in how I was directing my life. And I had to do that all while attending to the daily and often urgent priorities of life.
two types of priorities: both important
Creating this career shift took serious tenacity. I had to manage different kinds of priorities: the more urgent (and often daily) obligations of life and the non-urgent but true priorities that spoke to my fulfillment and growth.
Since I launched my coaching business, the urgent pressures of family, work, household, and other obligations have been fierce. Let’s just say I am part of the sandwich generation, with the demands of being both a parent and a daughter. Juggling these responsibilities along with my business has demanded a lot of me and my time.
Despite many obligations, I try not to lose focus on what matters most to me. These are matters that aren’t urgent or daily obligations but are crucial for living a life of fulfillment, purpose, and impact.
What are my true priorities? Meaningful time with my daughter, family time exploring the great outdoors of Utah, exercising, connecting with friends over the phone or at a coffee shop, learning new things, reading books, cooking, and tending to my new garden. Professionally, I’m always developing plans to reach my full potential.
These true priorities, while not urgent, are the drivers of my fulfillment, purpose, and impact in this world. They are my why. I’ve had to hold on tenaciously to keeping them at my center.
What it took to focus on my true priorities
Many people ask me: how can you possibly maintain focus on your priorities when everything and everyone else is calling for you?
Here is my approach:
Getting Clear on My Why: I start with intentions, not goals. An intention asks, “What is the outcome you really want? And why is it important?” When I take the time to get clear on how my true priorities are, in fact, the way I want to live my life and show up in the world, I am getting clear on why they matter. I write down those intentions and keep them prominent in my daily and weekly planning.
Remembering That I Do Have the Time: There are 168 hours in a week. After accounting for sleep and full-time work, there are still around 40 hours available. I start small by asking: What is ONE THING I can do to move things ahead? I've seen the power of small steps building momentum. Every week, I ensure that some of my true priorities are on my weekly to-do list. After several months of small but meaningful steps, I notice I’ve made meaningful progress on these non-urgent but important true priorities. I remember that over time, small actions can add up.
“People overestimate what they can get done in a year and underestimate what they can get done in five years.” -Bill Gates
Drawing Boundaries: I understand that I can endlessly serve everyone else’s needs. That is why it is critical for me to be intentional about saying no. I still struggle with saying yes when I don’t have the time, but I always ask, what can I drop? (See my blog: Empowering Yourself to Say No)
Never giving up: If I look back at the past 7 years, there were roadblocks, challenges, and many times when I could have given up. Indeed, there were times when I took a short cut or a pathway that was a dead end. I can promise you there were a few times I had to pick myself back up after a failure, and get back on the horse again. My trajectory was anything but straight and highly efficient. But I’ve always came back to reminding myself that the life I want to leave is one where I feel strong, confident, and creating the impact I care about most.
Ultimately, I’ve learned that just working through a to-do list isn’t really a life well lived. The practice I’ve embraced is one where I shoehorn my own priorities onto that daily to-do list. Maybe it’s just one action or maybe it’s more. But my true priorities are always ‘on the list.’ It’s also a practice that requires intention and tenacity.
The rewards are worth it
Navigating the delicate balance between urgent obligations and true priorities is a constant challenge, but it's one that brings immense rewards. By staying clear on my intentions, valuing my time, drawing firm boundaries, and keeping the big picture in view, I’ve crafted a life that aligns with my values and passions. This journey has shown me that small, consistent actions lead to significant transformations. As I continue to grow and evolve in both my personal and professional life, I remain committed to honoring my true priorities, ensuring that every step I take is purposeful and fulfilling. Thank you for joining me on this journey, and I hope it inspires you to reflect on and prioritize what truly matters in your own life.